; the fifteen fiercest fictional females you don't want to fuck with.
Robin - HIMYM
Robin: [Downs drink] I can't believe my baby sister is planning to lose her virginity to a douche with a faux-hawk. This can't happen, you guys have help me talk her out of it.
Marshall: A speech to talk a girl out of sex...
Ted: ...yeah I don't have any of those.
Barney: Discouraging premarital sex is against my religion.
Robin: Please! I'm her older sister I'm supposed to teach her how to make good and responsible decisions!
Lily: It's 2 o'clock and you've already had three Scotch and Sodas.
Robin: [Slurred speech] That's why I need your help!
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Because I want to be her when I grow up. Seriously! Canadian, check. Reporter, check. Wants to travel and focus on career and neverever have kids, major check. I just love that there's a chick on a sitcom who's not into romance or happily ever after.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 5. She's smart and funny and (up until recently) totally in control of her life, but since she's never killed a dude with her bare hands (that we know of) she's still pretty low on the scale.
ALICE - CLOSER
Lying's the most fun a girl can have without taking her clothes off - but it's better if you do.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Because in a movie about lying and cheating and deceit, she's the only character that makes you sympathise with her, think she's really a decent, albeit naive, person who doesn't deserve all this betrayal - only to find out she was lying all along, since the very beginning.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 5. Would be lower but she just looks so good in a pink wig.
HARLEY QUINN - BATMAN
Harley Quinn[disguised as a flight attendant]: Batman, thank god you're here! Some man took over the plane."
Batman: The Joker.
Harley Quinn: [pulls out gun] Yeah. Ain't he neat?
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Why isn't she ferosh? Homegirl is crazy, straight-up. Would you want to run into her in a dark alley? Sure, she's more often than not found in a less-than-healthy relationship (Joker, Ivy) but we all no hell hath no fury like a chick who's always getting dumped on.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 6. She's a villain, for fuck's sake, an honest to god villain.
REGINA GEORGE - MEAN GIRLS
Regina George: Hello, may I please talk to Taylor Wedell?
Taylor Wedell's Mom: She's not home yet, who's calling?
Regina George: This is Susan from Planned Parenthood, I have her test results. If you could have her call me as soon as she can. It's urgent, Thank You.
[Taylor Wedell's mom faints]
Regina George: She's not going out with anyone.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: She's a life ruiner. She ruins peoples lives. Seriously, who didn't know a Regina back in high school? I knew her, fuck for a while I was her. That's what makes this bitch so evil - we've all gone head to head with someone just like her. Whether or not we pushed them in front of a bus is another story.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 6.5. Do not trust her, she is a fugly slut.
WILLOW - BTVS
Mom! I'm not acting out... I'm a witch. I make pencils float. I summon the four elements! Well... two elements... but four soon. And I'm dating a musician!
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Because you don't have to be bad to be a badass. She was little quiet dorky girl, and then she's saving the world and being a witch and dating girls. Talk about character development. Sure, the whole destroying the world thing wasn't her best idea, but at least it got her out of that awful addicted-to-magic storyline.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 7, a balance between sweet season two Willow and killing-you-all season six Willow.
SUN - LOST
Yes, you do know, Mr. Widmore... just like you know we've been lying all this time about where we were and what happened to us there. You and I have common interests. When you're ready to discuss them... (Sun hands Widmore her business card). Call me. As you know, we're not the only ones who left the island.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Did you not see season four? Sun is a force to be reckoned with. I love the scene where she's talking to her father about how she's going to ruin his life. Did anyone not want to scream "FUCK YEAH!"? Because I did (in fact I might have actually screamed that. Moving on..)
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: Solid 7, but rating may increase come season five.
SELENA - 28 DAYS LATER
Have you got any plans, Jim? Do you want us to find a cure and save the world or just fall in love and fuck? Plans are pointless. Staying alive's as good as it gets.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: She survived the end of the world. With attitude. Also, that is one of my favourite movie quotes of all time.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER:7.5 She can wield a knife like no other. When the zombie apocalypse happens, I want her on my team.
ANNE BOLEYN - THE TUDORS
Queen Katherine: He will tire of you, like all the others.
Anne Boleyn: And what if he does not?
WHY SHE'S FEROSH Watch. The. Tudors. If you don't end up thinking Anne is the most badass homewrecker you can't help but LOOOOOOVE then I just don't know what to say to you.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 8. The whole dead for centuries thing leaves her pretty non-threatening these days.
ROUGE - XMEN
Storm: Storm, Mistress of the Elements, commands you to release that child! Rogue: Lighten up on your speeches, Sugar. WHY SHE'S FEROSH
: This chick was my childhood hero. For real, I watched the cartoon all the time, always played as Rogue when the neighbourhood kids would get together and pretend to be superheroes and I'm pretty sure I used a fake accent and said "sugar" all the time. She's badass and aggressive but still funny and seriously, just totally awesome. Minus the movies. RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER:
8. Thanks for nothing, Brian Singer/Brett Ratner/Anna Paquin.
LUCILLE BLUTH - ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT
Something-dale. I don’t know -- Brookfeather, Raintree. It’s hot. It was very hot there. I’ve never been - get a warrant!
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: She's a bitch. She's mean and manipulative and rude to her children and racist and classist and a million other things that end in -ist but damn, don't you love her for it? She destroys her kids lives, runs a company into illegal territory from behind the scenes and makes it all look easy.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 8. Nothing says class like a vodka rocks for breakfast.
FOX - WANTED
Wesley: Have you ever thought about doing things differently?
Fox: How do you mean?
Wesley: I don't know. Being somebody else? Someone... normal?
Fox: [after a long pause] No.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Well for starters, she's an assassin. She carries guns at all times and does things like lie on hoods of cars and shoot at people. She makes out with James McAvoy for fun. Also, she's freaking Angelina Jolie. Did I mention the assassin part?
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 8.5. It was a tough call, should I demerit her for being dead or honour her for living by the code? It fell somewhere in the middle. Also, ASSASSIN!
ROSE, MARTHA & DONNA - DOCTOR WHO
Rose: I am the Bad Wolf. I create myself. I take the words, I scatter them through time and space to lead myself back here.
Martha: Doctor? It's Martha... and I'm bringing you back to earth.
Donna: Donna, by the way. Donna Noble; since you didn't ask. I'll have a salute.
WHY THEY'RE FEROSH: I couldn't pick just one. I couldn't separate them and choose who I think is more badass than the others, I just couldn't. These girls have all saved the world numerous times, gone head-to-head with aliens, robots, robot aliens, etc etc etc and always won the battle AND the war. I can't wait to see what the new companion, whoever it may be, will bring.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: Each come in at a solid 9. Combined that puts them at 27.
SCULLY - THE XFILES
You know, it's strange - men can blow up buildings, and they can be nowhere near the crime scene. But we can piece together the evidence and convict them beyond a doubt. Our labs here can recreate out of the most microscopic details their motivation and circumstance to almost any murder. Right down to a killer's attitude towards his mother and that he was a bed wetter. But in the case of a woman... my sister... who was gunned down in cold blood in a well-lit apartment building by a shooter who left the weapon at the crime scene, we can't even put together enough to keep anybody interested.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: She is fantastic and tough and smart and manages to see the craziest things any human being can see and doesn't lose her mind, and that's more than I could say for most people. She's level-headed and rational and always thinking and planning, but isn't stiff or boring. She's still funny and light or aggressive and passionate when she needs to be. Is my mad love shining through?
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER 9. I love you Scully!
JULIET - LOST
[Juliet enters the room where the Others are keeping Kate. Kate tries to overpower Juliet. Juliet pwns her]. I was just bringing you lunch.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: As if that quote didn't explain it enough. It's pretty hard to not be a fierce motherfucker on Lost, but Juliet has risen to the top of the badasses. Her oneliners always have a bit of a bite to them, her actions always show her strength and her non-willingness to put up with everyone's shit. Hell, dealing with Ben Linus on a daily basis for three years and not killing yourself is enough to get you on this list, but she did it with style.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: 9.5 which I trust will rise. This season of Lost looks it's most badass, and she'll totally get bonus points when she starts banging Sawyer. Jack who?
BUFFY - BTVS
Alright... yes, date, and shop and hang out and go to school and save the world from unspeakable demons. You know, I wanna do girlie stuff.
WHY SHE'S FEROSH: Can this be summed up in one paragraph? She is the Slayer. She saved the world about once a week for seven years, all while dealing with typical teenage problems (trying to pass classes, fighting with the parents, etc) to the harder life problems (mom dying, boyfriend leaving town, etc) and of course, the problems no one but Buffy would ever have to face (vampire boyfriend getting his soul back and trying to kill you, getting dragged out of heaven, etc). Sure, sometimes she can be self righteous and kind of bratty, but she's Buffy. She's the most ass-kickingest girl to ever grace our screens and we should be thankful for her presence. Even when she's bratty.
RANKING ON THE FIERCE-O-METER: She's a 10. She's the chosen one, you can't get much fiercer than that.
THUS CONCLUDES MY FAVOURITE HBICs PICSPAM. It has taken me ages to compile this, aaaages. Please stay tuned for part two, the male counterpart - my favourite BAMFs. Coming soon.